don’t give up…

Things I know to be true:

It is natural to feel hurt or anger for a short time – it’s normal – there is nothing wrong with you.

You can love.

You can trust.

You can allow yourself to be vulnerable in love.

You can bond.

You can invest yourself in someone or something.

Pain is real. It is okay to allow yourself the gift of feeling it, completely. You don’t have to mask it or rush through it.

Acknowledge all of your feelings – hurt, grief, pain, anger, mistrust, doubts, GUILT, betrayal, insecurity, RELIEF – allowing all these emotions some space and time will help you.

You can endure the pain. You HAVE to endure the pain. It hurts like heck. It is raw. Nothing, I mean nothing or no one will make it hurt any less. Endure it. With time it begins to hurt less. And yes, there will be days when the sting roars back and is almost unbearable. Acknowledge it, again, recognize the antecedent and tread carefully next time, you will be stronger next time (and yes, there will be a next time).

You will heal.

You have friends who love you.

You have family who love you.

You can talk to someone.

You can talk about the pain, the hurt.

Someone will want to listen to you.

Someone will care about you.

Someone will love you more than anything.

Someone will want a lifetime with you.

You are not alone.

ALL that you feel is real.

You have to live. Do something. Get out. Be with friends. Be with family.

Give yourself the gift of time. Time to heal. Time to be good for yourself.

Your challenges do not define you.

Your pain does NOT define you.

Write. Write. Write. – See the truth in your words. See the tears that stain your journal. Get the words out of your head, somehow, get them out.

You can take responsibility for your actions.

You can forgive yourself.

You can learn from your pain.

You can be thankful.

You will grow stronger.

You will be kinder.

You will be more mindful.

You will learn.

You will hope.

You will dream.

You may ask how do you know this to be true? I know this to be true because this is my journey. I am real. I am genuine. I am being honest with myself. I write what I feel. I write what I live. Living with struggles or challenges is different for different people. There is no right way to get through pain (physical or emotional). Each of us will have different reactions. What is important is that you know; YOU ARE NOT ALONE, YOU ARE LOVED, YOU ARE GOODNESS and this world NEEDS YOU.

Wishing you endless peace, joy & love with all that I am.

-J

It’s time to begin…

“It’s time to begin, isn’t it?
I get a little bit bigger but then I’ll admit
I’m just the same as I was
Now don’t you understand
That I’m never changing who I am”

The last couple of days have been filled with an overwhelmingly peaceful sense of forgiveness that I never could have imagined, especially at this current moment in my life. I know now…I know today more than ever that being unforgiving and untrusting is not ever going to be who I am. I love and when I love, I love deeply, it’s just who I am. Rejection, departures, death it all hurts, they are all heartbreaking and cause a tremendous, almost unbearable amount of emotional pain. But they will not keep me from being kind, grateful, forgiving, trusting, and loving – from being who I am. The pain that comes from loving so deeply is helping to make me softer, kinder, more compassionate, more trusting and has led me to honor and value life even more.

In the midst of heartbreak. In the midst of constant journal writing and what seems like a constant state of introspection I can see myself again. The last couple of days I’ve said yes to things and people I normally would have said no to. The fear of being alone, of not being balanced, of not being myself is being flooded by joy & gratitude. I’m kinder to myself. I am loving myself as I should have been all along. My life is moving forward. Life is no longer what happens around me it is happening with me, with my full attention and respect. I am grateful for the goodness in each new day.

It’s time to begin, isn’t it?

– J